Some of the best one liners jokes are ones you make up yourself over time.
The best one liners jokes tend to make a comeback during key occasions. At election time we’ll hear that politicians are like diapers – they need changing regularly and for the same reason. At those times you can point out that the evening news is a programme that starts by wishing you a good evening then proceeds to tell you why it isn’t.
At important times like this you will find yourself in arguments and discussions, and this is when the best one liners jokes are needed as a defence and a weapon. Instead of the friendly agreeing to disagree, why not say ‘If I agreed with you we’d both be wrong’? Of course the world leaders will be showing us up with their own bad behaviour, so we could comment, using our best one liner jokes, that ‘We never really grow up, we only learn how to act in public.’
During such discussions you can withdraw with some of your best one liners jokes, advising others never to argue with an idiot as he will drag you down to his level and beat you with experience. Your group of friends may be talking about how to put the world to rights, so bring out your best one liners jokes and point out that we live in a society where pizza arrives at the door faster than the police. You can even hide behind your best one liners jokes if you decide to do a complete u-turn on your opinions. Just say, ‘My opinions may have changed but not the fact that I’m right.’
If your boss comes in and finds you wasting company time on such chat, your best one liners jokes could help. Point out that a bus stops at a bus station, a train stops in a train station, and that on your desk the business has given you a work station. Your best one liners jokes could lose you your friends, your job and your relationship but at least you’d be funny. Perhaps it would be best to save some of your best one liners jokes for stand-up comedy.
You won’t die on stage but you might want to use some of your best one liners jokes to talk about your demise. No subject is taboo for good comedy and the best one liners jokes are no exception. If people get too miserable talking about death, throw in a few of your best one liners jokes. Tell them ‘I want to die peacefully in my sleep like my grandfather and not kicking and screaming like the passengers in his car.’ Best one liners jokes to end on are also ‘I want to live forever, and so far so good’ and ‘What does it feel like to be this old? Better than the alternative.’
